You know how to use them

i'm asking for blue birds, and red birds.
please let me know.

the brink: more jumping

jumping off the edge, and, if you cannot fly, inevitably, crashing.

you pull yourself, half comotose, to the only place you know - the edge - and you stand there until you come to, on the edge, like you've always been. you jump off the edge again, crash, and return. each time, upon impact, a little retrograde amnesia, so the freefall is more like a hazy dream.

did that really even happen?

yes, it happened. you jump, again and again. you will never stop jumping, until finally, one day, you soar.

madness.
beautiful madness.

the time illusion

it feels early in the morning, but it's more like early in that late sort of way. what is the deal with time? and how our perception of it is limited by our sleep patterns?

what time is it?

and what the bleep do we really know?

(well, i do know that if you write the word LOVE and attach that note to something and then put it in a guitar, along with your best intentions, that thing cannot help but be better for it. science told us that. we're talking well documented molecule structure stuff. stuff you can't make up. but then, you must be able to imagine it).

crazy neo hippie freaks.

inside out

"The reason why no one has successfully been able to form a resistance against Global Tyranny, endless war, Famine, and Bigotry, is because no one accepts the fact that deep down inside we need these things, and indeed we created them. Not on a conscious level, but on an unconscious universal level through the behaviors, thoughts and actions that we don't recognize about ourselves. We created the evil on this earth. And there's no reason to beat ourselves up over it. We needed to create it. It is necessary to have these things in physical form in order to show us what we are doing to ourselves on the inside. And until we take responsibility for our own thoughts and actions, there is not a political leader among us, not a religion on earth, not a revolution or movement in sight, and not a reform of society in the world that will save us from the extinction in front of us."

- http://www.talismanicidols.org

getting cocky

why is it considered cocky to share the best parts of ourselves with others? where do we get this idea that humility means presenting less of yourself to others?

humility is the defining characteristic of an unpretentious and modest person, someone who does not think that he or she is better or more important than others.

if we present less of ourselves to feel humble, we must feel that we are better or more important than others. we must feel that we need to be less in order not to appear better. this is false humility. this is, in fact, no humility at all.

to be at your best and still believe that you are no better or more important than any other is true humility. it also empowers those around you by acknowledging that they are as important and as good as your best self. unfortunately, cultural consciousness traps us in a mentality of less-than-ness. if you are something that i admire, than i am less than you. we cannot admire each other, without denigrating ourselves. the opposite is true as well, that we cannot admire ourselves without denigrating each other.

i seek mutual admiration, mutually empowering. i seek my own infinite potential, and i encourage you to seek your own. your best will only empower my best. your worst will only seek to better both of us. and i will bless you for it. you cannot be less than you are. you are more and forever growing.

who you are now creates who you are tomorrow, and if you seek to be better tomorrow, bless today, whatever it is, as a step towards tomorrow.

if there is even a smidgen of goodness in your life - and there must be, or you are not looking closely enough - everything else is for that. changing even one thing creates a butterfly effect, making some things possible and others not so. everything is necessary to create even the smallest goodness, and even the smallest goodness is worth infinitely more than great bad. that you have been protected from other great bads is, in itself, a great good. bless all of it, for you have no idea what could or could not have been as a result. imagine the possibilities! all moment is pregnant with potential. all moment is pure creation. all moment is necessary. all moment is awesome.

i'll take that to go

I got curious
so i googled
'how to leave your life'
i got how to leave your lover
how to leave London
and how to leave your job
really?
is that a hint
a clue
my calling
should i do it
so that i can write about it
so that the next person who gets curious
can know about it
or maybe we're not supposed to write about it
maybe we're just supposed to leave it hidden
let people think
it's their own calling

people do it
they leave their life everyday
what's a life anyway
your job? your friends?
your family? your thoughts?
what if you only leave one of those things?
what combination of these aspects
does it take
to make a life
and what combination
of insanity, dreaming,
yearning, hope
does it take
to change it

limited freedom

it is only the perception of freedom if we are not aware of our limitations. we cannot be free if we continue to let ourselves be enslaved by the forces that act on us subconsciously. to give your mind over to someone in the name of freedom is a paradox.

the common good is one thing, but group think is quite another.

cultivate a critical mind.
think for yourself.

prescription latex

How do I control my feelings?
My thoughts that reel faster the more I try and stop them.
That moment of toe in cold water turned running full steam into that ocean of uncertainty that seems to stretch out forever.
That pit of my stomach churning acid and coating doubt with assumptions- negative ones.
Do I need to see a shrink?
Do I need medication?
I feel embarrassed to ask for professional help.
So I suffer not so silently.
Does it make me stronger? Or just wear me down?
Truth seeker seeks comfort even if it's not true.
Hopeless romantic attempts slow steps against her nature.
She knows what she wants... so she goes and gets it.
Not in this case.
So how long should she/could she wait until a decision is made?
Waiting makes layers of dust fall on unmoved objects and the same applies to your emotions. This itchy, need to go somewhere dust is paralyzing and fidgety.
Anxiety.
The single most uncomfortable, over powering, body breaking, mind reeling state of BEING! And I haven't found an instant remedy for it yet.
I'm trying.
This is my attempt at releasing some of the tension to make room for happy balloons that I attach to the baggage in my mind and heart.
Over one hurdle and on to the next...
Feeling guilty about feeling bad, feeling sad, what if.
Instead of swimming against the current..I swim with
Let it take me where it needs to go and where I need to know.
Let it lose me away for awhile.
Happy balloons arrive at any time.
As do the heavy suitcases.
Always something to learn.
Hope is really light.
It's fast to escalate but it's also....light. Easy to blow away.
Short term, Long term
Truth Seeker, she's hoping.

about true love

if true love is simply a love that is true, then isn't all love true love? for how can anything be love if it isn't true? and does its lack of truth make it false, or are there degrees of love? like "i love you, but not in that way". or "i love you, but i don't want to marry you. ever". or "i love you, but only if you are the person i thought i could mold you into, and not if you insist on being this stranger, this person who you really are, this person i was too blind to even notice throughout the last thousand days or so". or "i love you, but i'm pretty sure it's only temporary". or "i love you, but i have no idea what that even means".

does anyone?

of course, we never say these things. we may think them, but they are never spoken and released into the atmosphere as evidence of our truth. we invest years into people we are pretty sure are not in fact our true loves, yet there we remain - poised to be miserable with the hope that things might change, at some point. perfectly satisfied with a mediocre expression of what the limitless potential our souls have to love another. willing to accept an ordinary life for ourselves when we know full well that there is something fucking extraordinary out there, waiting.

waiting for us to get out of our own way.

our way is plagued with loneliness, yet it is also our biggest fear. and, if loneliness is all we've ever known, we fear its absence. more than anything, we fear the day our hearts will know true companionship because then what? we live in fear. i live in fear. most of the time, i am afraid of everything. a lot of the time, the awareness is overwhelming. and i start to wonder how people manage, like how to people manage to share themselves with another being? then i remember - they're living lies, same as me, only different lies. they live lies about other people - at least my lies are completely my own.

luckily, though, there is something that outweighs the loneliness. it is hope.

i hope there is such a thing as true love, or at least my idea of it. my idea of true love? a lasting love. it's loving with the knowledge that the love will never fade, because you've loved this soul before. your soul and this soul have passed through a thousand year's worth of days and are merely continuing what can never end, because true love has been predetermined.

true love is spending a quiet saturday morning in bed reading each other's favourite parts from your favourite books until oneday, the phone rings. thirty years have disappeared into the great abyss of happy existence and your oldest son is calling with news.

he's found his true love.

i believe this. and, though i sometimes allow myself to suffer and dwell in the loneliness i know that one day this day will become part of my truth.

for we all have the ability to make true love happen.

we just have to get out of our own way.

that being said - what the fuck do i know?

*shrug*

welcome, Loves

we are in good company so far.

Nice job

I think its a great idea to stay connected like this and discuss the things you mentioned. Good work. I'll check in again soon.

Dear friends,

This is a dialogue, I’m just wondering if you want to take part in it.

I want to talk about who we are, culturally, spiritually, physically, psychically, mathematically, linguistically, whatever… who are we? And who do we want to be? What’s working? What isn’t? and, by extension of that, how could it work better? How can we elevate our experience?

I believe we have the answer to these questions, we just need to remember them. We just need to ask ourselves. We need to ask each other.

No judgment.

Just observation.

…or as far as we’ve come on that continuum. Thereby acknowledging to ourselves that we are still growing and evolving – you, of unlimited potential. I promise you growth is the most fun you can have.

And what is growth anyway?

Looking back on how far you’ve come should make you proud, not ashamed of any of your previous selves. Without the path, you would never reach your destination. Resent not the path, no matter how long and torturous it was. If your true Love is at the end, it’s always worth it.

Let us examine critically what our true Love is. Let us offer suggestions of how that is limiting. Because we all know that, so far, it is. Let’s get unlimited.

Let us examine separation. Is it working? Does it serve us, individually, to feel separation from another person or group of people, or everyone?

I think we all know that, collectively it isn’t working. By its very definition, it just couldn’t – the collectively separated. Is the collective even our goal? Should it be?

Let us argue for all sides. And let us smile and laugh while we are doing it.

Let us examine justice, and what it means to be wronged by somebody. Let us wonder for a moment, if maybe we cannot be.

What could you possibly take away from anybody that means anything? Isn’t the only thing that is worth anything freely given anyway?

Let us elevate our consciousness.

Let us fly a little further off the ground, and still stay connected.

Anybody with me?